Friday, February 12, 2010

Dear So and So - New York/New Jersey Edition

Dear So and So...

Dear New York & New Jersey,

I have been so irritated with you the past few weeks that this entire post is devoted to you!

1. When the train doors open, step aside and let the arriving passengers off first before you crowd the door and push your way in. Things will move a lot faster... I promise.

2. If you are not going to make a clean entry onto the train, wait for the next one that will be along in approximately 3 - 5 minutes. Do not stand there like an idiot holding the door. You're not funny and all you're doing is making the rest of us late.

3. How about everyone go up one side of the stairs and down the other.

4. Put your umbrella away. It is only snow and you look like an idiot.

5. While we're on the topic of umbrellas... how about learn how to work yours. Walking with your umbrella directly in front of you face is not the correct way to walk with an umbrella.

6. It is not necessary to walk out in the street and in front of traffic while waiting for the light to change. Just because I prefer to stand on the curb out of the way of traffic does not mean you need to push me out of the way because you need to stand in traffic.

7. Oh, and by the way, if you're in your vehicle approaching an intersection and you see the light changing to yellow why not stop on the other side of the intersection instead of stopping in the middle of it. I'm not sure if you're aware but when the light turns yellow that means that it is going to be red shortly. All you're doing now is blocking eveyrone from advancing to their final destinations.

8. When there is a half empty train platform, is it really necessary for you to stand right next to me?

9. How about when you're exiting or entering the train? Is it also necessary for you to be right on my ass for no apparent reason? I don't know you so back off!

10. If you're in that much of a hurry to get somewhere you should have left earlier!



Kat said...

I live in the umbrella capital of the world (England)(I know this because they have nicknames for umbrellas (Brolly)) and because it rains here so much, people just usually tough it out and don't bother with them.

Buckeroomama said...

I totally agree with #1!