Saturday, May 7, 2016

Reflections on Being a Mommy

I was one of the many who became a mom for the first time at a later age.  There was really no rhyme or reason for waiting.  It just sort of happened that way.  Getting married and having a family was never one of my "must have" goals.  It if happened, I was ok with it.  And if it never happened, I was ok with that too.  I didn't meet Freddy until I was almost 30 and was 35 when I had Marshall.  So I had a lot of living completed during the time period that we'll call "Before Marshall".

I will say that I find all these articles and song parodies of how hard it is to be a mom rather annoying and not really all that funny.  We all get it.  It is hard being a mom.  The way I see it is that it is a different kind of hard.

Before I had Marshall, I was focused on my job.  I am an IT Project Manager, which can be rather mentally exhausting and required that I be available at all hours of the day and night depending on what projects I am working on.  I lived in New York City.  Living in New York City is hard.  Everything is more expensive than it needs to be.  It can take you an hour to go 5 miles... longer if the weather is bad.  Customer service doesn't exist.  You really can only buy what you can carry to your apartment, which, for us, was a 5th floor walkup.

Being without children obviously provides for some added freedoms such as only needing to worry about getting yourself ready or not having to worry about childcare.  If I needed to, I could work until 6 or 7 at night... and I usually did.  But at the same time, you worry more about your appearance and, thinking back, I spent a lot more money frivolously then.  As a result... no savings!

Fast forward to now.

I am constantly tripping over action figures... or turtles... or power rangers.

Every time I try to take a nice picture, Iron Man needs to be included.

I find visitors hitching rides in my purse.

I constantly have an audience of some kind 24/7.

I tend to drink "coffee" a bit more frequently.

But, I have become a lego kit building ninja.

And light saber practice happens in my front yard.

And occasionally I have dinozords on my front porch.

And... Minecraft...

And this happens... usually on movie night when not a single one of us makes it to the end.

But, most importantly, I have someone to be goofy with... at least until he turns 13 and doesn't think I'm cool anymore.

I'm not saying everyone should be a mom because not everyone wants to be one and that's ok.  For the longest time I didn't think I wanted to be one.  I think it had something to do with working at Meijer during the back to school and Christmas seasons while I was in college and listening to all the screaming kids.  Looking back, that just meant I wasn't ready to have kids.  And I believe that when people say they don't want kids it really means they aren't ready.  Some people are never ready to have kids and others have kids before they are ready.

At the end of the day, I'd like to say Happy Mother's Day to all the kid mommies, furbaby mommies, those who are take care of other family members and friends and strangers, and those who are taking care of themselves.



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